You're not alone... but you are.

I come from a family who is completely crazy about Michael Jackson. 
My dad wouldn't like me to include him in that, so we won't. :) Everyone EXCEPT my father loves Michael and his music. We grew up with him in our house, thanks to my older sister Terra, and I don't think I could ever get sick of his music.

One song that I've always loved, but never really agreed with, is "You Are Not Alone" 
I mean, in a spiritual sense, yeah, we aren't ever alone.
And if you wanna say that a piece of someone, who is really important to you, is in your heart, then... yeah... I guess that makes sense.
We like to make ourselves feel better and make us feel like that person is still with us.

But put aside the spiritual, and the sentimental, and what do you have?

YOU.

You are living your life alone. Or i guess i should say I am living my life alone.
Without that one person, or hundreds of children, to talk to and love, and adore.

This isn't supposed to be depressing, and I just realized it's headed towards that.

Okay, so of course I have my beloved family, and friends surrouding me and they are SO great.
I love them so much.

This is the thing.
Why do we ever think that being alone is a bad thing?

As of today, I've felt the most alone i've ever felt for about three months now.
I can't hold my babies the way I could three months ago.
Right now the closest thing I get to holding them is holding a picture of them close to my heart.
I don't have a date planned for everynight of the week like I used to, have someone to always talk me through things and help me make decisions, and have someone always telling me how great I am (not that I actually am, it just helped me feel good about myself:))

Although, I haven't stopped missing any of what I mentioned before....

Three months have gone by and I feel like i'm in a good place.
I'm becoming more and more confident in my own skin.
I've always been myself, but everyday i'm alone I find more and more about myself.
What I like, what I don't. What I really believe, and what I don't believe.
I find that I LOVE learning, and I love people.
I love talking to strangers, most of the time, and I am so happy with my life because of that.
Life becomes so interesting when you get to explore it by yourself.
Right now, every door in this world is open to me.
I can do anything I want.
Somethings are going to take a lot more work than others, but all the more reason to do it, right?

Being alone has been so good for me.
I have taken my understanding of my own heart and thoughts to another level.
I know who I am.
and I most definitely know what I want and what I am doing.
I can look any person in this world in the eye and tell them I am so happy with life right now.
I mean it.
I've never been happier in this wonderful little Utah Valley.

I think this is the first step to becoming who I want to be.
Being happy with me and everything that goes on in this crazy head of mine.

So next time someone says, "You are not alone."
What do you say?
"Who cares if I am?"

If you are alone be proud of it, and LIVE.